We're only human.

chemicaldarkshine:

hardestcopy:

bijou1986:

A Mom went to have dinner with her son who lives with his roommate.During the course of the meal, his mother couldn’t help but notice how handsome his roommate was. She had been suspicious about her sons sexuality but being a good mother she felt that he would let her know if and when the time was right but seeing the two together just made her more curious.Over the course of the evening, while watching the interaction between the two she wondered even more if there was more here than meets the eye. Her son, sensing his mothers watchfully eye volunteered, “really Mom, I can tell what you’re thinking and you can just get it out of your mind, we are just roommates and nothing more”.About a week later the roommate remarked, “ever since your mother was here the silver serving platter has been missing, do you think she took it?”He responded, “Well I’m sure she didn’t but I will email her and ask just to be sure” he sat down and wrote:Hey MomI’m not saying you did take the silver platter from the house and I am not saying you didn’t take it but the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.Love,Your Son.A couple days later he got a response from his mother:Dear Son,I am not saying that you do sleep with your roommate and I am not saying that you don’t sleep with him and you know I love you and could care less either way but the fact remains that if he was sleeping in his own bed he would have found the platter under his pillow.When are the two of you coming for dinner?Love,Mom


BEST MOM

I’m crYING
Aug 28

chemicaldarkshine:

hardestcopy:

bijou1986:

A Mom went to have dinner with her son who lives with his roommate.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn’t help but notice how handsome his roommate was. She had been suspicious about her sons sexuality but being a good mother she felt that he would let her know if and when the time was right but seeing the two together just made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the interaction between the two she wondered even more if there was more here than meets the eye. Her son, sensing his mothers watchfully eye volunteered, “really Mom, I can tell what you’re thinking and you can just get it out of your mind, we are just roommates and nothing more”.

About a week later the roommate remarked, “ever since your mother was here the silver serving platter has been missing, do you think she took it?”

He responded, “Well I’m sure she didn’t but I will email her and ask just to be sure” he sat down and wrote:

Hey Mom
I’m not saying you did take the silver platter from the house and I am not saying you didn’t take it but the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Love,
Your Son.

A couple days later he got a response from his mother:

Dear Son,
I am not saying that you do sleep with your roommate and I am not saying that you don’t sleep with him and you know I love you and could care less either way but the fact remains that if he was sleeping in his own bed he would have found the platter under his pillow.
When are the two of you coming for dinner?
Love,
Mom

image

BEST MOM

I’m crYING

(via nevershootthewendybird)

Aug 28

(Source: httpvomit, via methzilla)

mankvill:

Literally me.
Aug 28

mankvill:

Literally me.

(via hotsytotsy)

nefertsukia:

throbbing-lung-fiber:

le-corbeau-fou:

bates—motel:

I mean come on

the whole movie is gold

It’s just one pun after another

The movie is completely random and it’s amazing

 

someone find the shit hitting the fan gif.

"PUTANA DA SEATBELTZ"

(via kaitipaiti)

Aug 28
Why don’t we talk about Airplane! on Tumblr?

falloutuniverse:

sophasil:

-You’re platinum, pussycat! You know how to swing!
-Nice charlies, too! Give them a shake for the Ben-man, will ya? Hello!
-That was a nice bit of hey-hey, girlie. You’re a real ring-a-ding broad!
-Hold me, will ya? I swear you wore me out…
-*soft snoring*

THIS

Aug 28
More cool things to say during sex
Aug 28

(Source: waltdisneysdaily, via itsdempseybitch)

wakaswagihomie:

vikingserket:

wakaswagihomie:

I TRIED TO TAKE A PICTURE OF YEEHAW YAWNING AND

is your cat called yeehaw

His full name is Yeehaw Will Smith
Aug 28

wakaswagihomie:

vikingserket:

wakaswagihomie:

I TRIED TO TAKE A PICTURE OF YEEHAW YAWNING AND

is your cat called yeehaw

His full name is Yeehaw Will Smith

(via notmysecret)

Aug 28

sasstrid-and-dorkcup:

this entire episode is a treasure.

(Source: stripedsweater, via meghandot)

Aug 28

drowningxlessons:

sniktbub:

every goddamn it from iasip

i think the fact that im uploading this at 2 in the morning says it all

God damn it

(via triforceof-power)

thenimbus:

iguanatime:

he’s on an important journey

he’s late for a very important dateyou can tell from his expression
Aug 28

thenimbus:

iguanatime:

he’s on an important journey

he’s late for a very important date
you can tell from his expression

(Source: walk-sleepinq, via youthobeyinglucifer)